outta focus

it appears that because i have been focused on one girl for so long that i cannot refocus my lenses. i am having trouble seeing who out there, if any one, is out there for me. amanda has not been there for me like i thought she would. i also have not had any girls eger to knock down my door seeking me out other than spam emails from generic girls who nither walk or breathe.  i am not that desprete yet since being so is a turn off to them. but i am starting to get worried.  that i may never find her.